Playwright Jim Sherman wrote this today after Hu Jintao was named
  chief of the Communist Party in China.
  (We take you now to the Oval Office.)
  
  George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
  
  Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
  
  George: Great. Lay it on me.
  
  Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
  
  George: That's what I want to know.
  
  Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
  
  George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
  
  Condi: Yes.
  
  George: I mean the fellow's name.
  
  Condi: Hu.
  
  George: The guy in China.
  
  Condi: Hu.
  
  George: The new leader of China.
  
  Condi: Hu.
  
  George: The Chinaman!
  
  Condi: Hu is leading China.
  
  George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
  
  Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
  
  
  
  George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
  
  Condi: That's the man's name.
  
  George: That's who's name?
  
  Condi: Yes.
  
  George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader
   of China?
  
  Condi: Yes, sir.
  
  George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in
   the Middle East.
  
  Condi: That's correct.
  
  George: Then who is in China?
  
  Condi: Yes, sir.
  
  George: Yassir is in China?
  
  Condi: No, sir.
  
  George: Then who is?
  
  Condi: Yes, sir.
  
  George: Yassir?
  
  Condi: No, sir.
  
  George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of
   China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the
   phone.
  
  Condi: Kofi?
  
  George: No, thanks.
  
  Condi: You want Kofi?
  
  George: No.
  
  Condi: You don't want Kofi.
  
  George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of
   milk,then get me the U.N.
  
  Condi: Yes, sir.
  
  George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
  
  Condi: Kofi?
  
  George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
  
  Condi: And call who?
  
  George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
  
  Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
  
  George: Will you stay out of China?!
  
  Condi: Yes, sir.
  
  George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at
   the U.N.
  
  Condi: Kofi.
  
  George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the
   phone.
  
  (Condi picks up the phone.)
  
  Condi: Rice, here.
  
  George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too.
   Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the
   Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?